iPhone Joke Day Compilation

A few people have asked me to post some of the jokes from the iPhone Joke day I did on the 18/19th May 2010. I’ve posted them all here. Enjoy.

Officially announces that today shall be declared iPhone Joke Day. Hope owners can take it in jest; well they did buy one. #ipjd

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was trying to get a signal on his iPhone 4. #ipjd

BBC News: Police find 3 of Raoul Moat’s mobile phones. Two have been charged, but they’re holding his iPhone until they get a signal. #ipjd

Orange and Apple will make a great pear for the iPhone. #ipjd

I just heard about the new iPhone rickroll virus, they should be ashamed. Honestly, you know the rules, and so do I. #ipjd

40 attempted suicides at the iPhone factory – have they got an app for it now? #ipjd

Apples new app which lets you order a pizza, anywhere, from your iPhone. Strange, my phone already does this. #ipjd

Apple is about to give away two yoghurt pots and some string to all iPhone 4 users #ipjd

A local apple store was burgled for over 10k of merchandise. Police remain hopeful they can find and return both computers. #ipjd

iPhone share prices decreasing? Mmmmm… I do love to see an Apple Crumble. #ipjd

First the iPhone was left in a bar and now the bars have left the iPhone. #ipjd

Free iPad for all iPhone users. Just hold it closer to your face, simulating not being able to make calls by holding it. #ipjd

Apple: “”We tested the handsets with Jeremy Beadle, Stephen Hawking and Abu Hamza and no problems with signal were reported”” #ipjd

The iPhone killer: A Nokia strapped to a large hammer. #ipjd

I can’t believe Steve Jobs’s liver is replaceable but the battery in the iPhone is not. #ipjd

Apple issue fix for iPhone 4: Hold your penis with your other hand. #ipjd

The England team are expected to get a great reception upon their return… none of them have an iPhone. #ipjd

Only 0.55% of customers have called about the iPhone signal problem… Maybe the rest can’t get through? #ipjd

BBC NEWS: Apple advises on holding iPhone. I think theres an appendage for that. #ipjd

The iPhone. The only mobile with a name as self-obsessed as its users. #ipjd

I’ve still got plenty more, so iPhone Joke Day will continue tomorrow. Some good ones coming, I promise. #ipjd

So Steve Jobs said there is NO problem with the iPhone 4 antenna, which is why he is giving everyone a free case… #ipjd

iPhone Joke days continues! So far there’s only 1 person not realising that it’s a joke (by which I refer to the day, and to Apple) #ipjd

Two iPhone’s got married. It was a lovely ceremony, but the reception was awful… Apparently they held it in the wrong place. #ipjd

iPhone owners: Use the Built-in Compass and GPS to find the nearest public phone box. #ipjd

The founder of Apple just walked into the house and took all our Mr Sheen! Bloody Jobs, coming over here and stealing our polish. #ipjd

iPhone 4: Put your calls on hold simply by holding the phone. #ipjd

The iPhone 4 has a built in feature that stops smudge marks on the chrome finish. If you touch it it shorts out and loses signal. #ipjd

0.55% with dropped calls? That’s only 16,500 people that complained! About the same chance of having it nicked from your car. #ipjd

Life was much more simpler when apple and blackberry were just Mr. Kiplings pie fillings. #ipjd

Bill Gates has recently hired polish people to kidnap the CEO of Apple. He’s heard they are really good at taking Jobs. #ipjd

Around 1 person in 10 is homosexual. About 1 person in 10 uses an Apple. It’s a coincidence. Honestly. #ipjd

Apple are making a black AND a white version of the iPhone? That’s very PC. #ipjd

0.55% of all iPhone 4 users complained about antenna or reception. I don’t think it mentioned the other 99.45% that can’t call in. #ipjd

Already been screwed by Apple? That’s okay, they’re giving you a condom to fix it now. #ipjd

Just bought an iPod Touch. It’s just like an iPhone, but you can’t make calls… No, wait, it’s exactly like an iPhone. #ipjd

Apple announce that if you purchase a new iPhone 4 they will throw in a free blackberry so you can make a call #ipjd

Technically shoplifting an iPhone from their official shop only counts as scrumping. #ipjd

Problems with your iPhone? Don’t touch it in the sensitive area. Perverts. #ipjd

New iPhone advert – deaf couples can (finally) use Video Chat! Those who can’t afford £1/min can just send texts. #ipjd

WORST #ipjd joke: Is your iPhone broken? No bubbles when washing your cornea? Oh, wait, no, sorry. You’ve purchased a bad eye foam. #ipjd

Done with iPhone jokes! You want one compliment? At lreast tghe toiuchsxcreenb keytpadf isd reaslklyt accuyraterf abnd eadsy toi usre. #ipjd

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